God’s Got This

There are many devices in a man’s heart, But the counsel of Jehovah, that shall stand – Proverbs 19:21 ASV

I can’t tell you how many years I lived in fear.

I lived in fear at previous jobs:

What would happen if someone else screws up and then tries to blame it on me? How am I ever going to prove them wrong? I don’t always do things perfectly, I just do my best.

I lived in fear with friends:

What if I am spending all of this time in this group of people and they really don’t care about me? As soon as something happens, where they don’t need me anymore, I feel like they are just going to get rid of me. All of that hard work of making friends gone. And even worse – they are going to tell others just how bad I am.

I lived in fear with family, worrying the same basic thing:

What if all of this hard work is for nothing? All someone else has to do is open their mouth and all of my good is washed away.

This type of fear resonated in my life. It was from a limiting belief that came to me early in life. I really am not sure exactly where the belief came from, I just know that through many different small, seemingly insignificant events, my little mind created this false belief. Then one day, the mind wasn’t little anymore – and the false belief had not been proved wrong.

This limiting belief seemed to keep re-enacting itself out in my life in more and more horrifying ways. This is not what God wanted for me. God wanted me to overcome these thoughts – they are not from him. They are from the devil.

God sent some very special angels to help me – the first one was in Gary – the church outreach pastor. He taught me that prayer is everything. In order to overcome these thoughts, I have to focus on God. At first I didn’t believe him – I didn’t understand how simply praying was going to do anything.

We had a session each week. He must have had a pretty intense discussion with God, because each week he would tell me to provide him with the thing I was most afraid of that week. Then we would pray about it. He, without so much as a flinch, told me that without a doubt, he knew that there would be positive change in that situation by the next time met. Gary and I met for about 2 years. After those two years, he had me drinking the Kool Aid. Gary died in 2014 and it was devastating for me. It was devastating for lots of people. His memorial service was standing room only. What is so amazing is that Gary wasn’t perfect his whole life, he had skeletons in his closet too. But no one cared, they just cared how Gary treated them and the fact that Gary was an intentional man of God by the time he died.

So with all that Gary taught me, I should know that no matter the stressful situations I go through, I just need to keep my eyes on God. God will keep me safe from the devil. However, I STILL Falter. EVEN after Gary got me to drink the Kool Aid. That is how angry and intentional the devil is.

This past year I have been lucky enough to meet some very sweet sisters in Christ. They have helped to keep me on the path that Gary worked so hard to get me to walk toward and get on. You have to be intentional about staying on that path. Having soul sisters to assist you is imperative.

These are some of the Bible verses that my soul sisters have given to me over the past few months:

As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the Lord is flawless. He is a shield for all who take refuge in him. For who is God besides the Lord? And who is the Rock except our God? It is God who arms me with the strength and makes my way perfect. He makes my feet like the feet of a deer; He enables me to stand on the heights, He trains my hands (and my heart) for Battle; my arms can bend a bow of bronze. You give me your shield of victory, and your right hand sustains me; you stoop down to make me great. You broaden the path beneath me, so that my ankles do not turn – Psalm 18: 30-36

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go – Joshua 1:9

Do not fear, for I am with you: do not be afraid, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand – Isaiah 41:10

Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes – Psalm 37:7

The LORD will rescue me from every evil attack and will bring me safely to his heavenly kingdom. To HIM be glory for ever and ever. Amen. – 2 Timothy 4:18

And all those assembled here will know that it is not by sword or by spear that the LORD saves; for the battle is the LORD’s and He will give all of you into our hands – 1 Samuel 17:47

If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. If he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times comes back to you and says, “I repent” forgive him. – Luke 17: 3-4

So my soul sisters are making for darn sure that I know there is no reason to be afraid. THE DEVIL WILL NEVER WIN AGAINST GOD. So why am I afraid?

I am commanded by God to forgive. Sometimes it is easier than other times to do this. However, just last week, the author in the group, so I know that she does a lot of reading on the gospel, told me – what you need to do for people who refuse to apologize to you is “pray for their salvation”. I thought that this is a pretty powerful message. Pray for their salvation. That is the ultimate kick in the butt to the devil. No matter how much someone else tries to hurt me, I will still “pray for their salvation”. So even if they can’t apologize to me, I want to make sure that before they die, God plants in their hearts a desire to confess their sins to God so that they can go to heaven.

And in the end, that’s where I want them anyway.